Golden News Volume 15, Number 50 - Monday 10 June 2002 The official bulletin of the Rotary Club of Kowloon Golden Mile is published every Monday and is distributed to all club members, District officials and many other "friends of KGM". Winner "Best English Club Bulletin" in District 3450, 2001/2002 Visit our award winning website Still M.I.A.:   Yes, yes, I know. I missed another meeting, despite my best intentions. All I can do it quote one of my favorite sayings: "When you're up to your a** in crocodiles, it's difficult to remember that your initial objective was to drain the swamp!" and, damn, there's been a lot of crocodiles lately. Apart from numerous business projects to handle, this year my shooting group is holding it's triennial world championships, so I'm going nuts here. Don't get me wrong; I love what I'm doing, but there aren't enough hours in a day.   Anyway, no promises this week. If you see me, give me a hug. If you don't, hug each other. And, for God's sake, somebody feed the bloody crocodile!     This Week's Meeting: Our speaker this week is Mr. William Kam, and the topic of his presentation is "Hong Kong Aids Foundation".   Milestones: Birthday greetings for Wednesday 12 June to KGM Rotary Foundation Director Miranda "King" Kong, who shares her birthday with actor-singer Jim Nabors, the star of 60's comedy "Gomer Pyle". Well, gollllllllllllly.   Member Updates:    1) We sadly bid farewell to James Tsang, who tendered his resignation from KGM due to his increasingly hectic travel schedule. We wish James every success and happiness for the future, and hope he will rejoin us one day when his situation improves. 2) Our Irish legal-eagle Liam Drake advises his new email address is wdrake@netvigator.com.   Fellowship News:  KGM Fellowship Director David "Party Dude" Harilela informs members that our next regular fellowship will be the traditional NINC Night, once again generously hosted by our NINC (Non Indian, Non Chinese) members (a.k.a. The Gwai Lo's).   The event will be held at 7:30 p.m., Saturday 29 June 2002 at the "Cococabana Restaurant", Mo Tat Wan, Lamma Island. Apparently the restaurant specialises in serving Mediterranean food, washed down with copious quantities of Sangria. Ole! Members who prefer not to swim to Lamma are advised to meet at the Aberdeen Fish Market at 6:30 p.m. to catch the ferry departing at 6:45 p.m. The ferry ride takes about 20 minutes, followed by a brisk 3 minute walk to the restaurant. Paramedics will be standing by with oxygen. Those members who survive the gruelling walk can, encouraged by the live band, demonstrate their Salsa skills to those, like me, who will be receiving medical attention.   If you plan to attend this event, please contact KGM Vice-President Patricia "Iron Lady" Blair (no relation to Tony) by email.   District 3450 News:     1) SISTER DISTRICT SIGNING CEREMONY:   Apparently our District 3450 has agreed to become a sibling of District 3820 (Western Luzon, Philippines). The official signing ceremony will be held at 7:00 p.m. on Sunday 16 June 2002, at the Ocean Palace Restaurant, although the location of the venue has not been specified (I presume it's the one in Ocean Centre, Tsimshatsui).   And, since there's no such thing as a free lunch or dinner, the cost to witness this event is $200 per head. Members interested in attending or seeking more information should contact President Ebe by email.     ++++++++   2) 2002/2003 DISTRICT INSTALLATION (Reminder): This will be held from 6:00 p.m., Thursday 4 July 2002 at the HKCEC, Wanchai North. Members interested in attending this event should contact PE Nanu Lachman by telephone on 9025 6699 or by email.       Rotary International News: The RI Presidential Conference of Peace & Development will be held from Friday to Sunday, 9-11 August 2002 at the Renaissance Kuala Lumpur Hotel, Malaysia.   Web Side Story: The weakest part of our award-winning website this year has been a lack of photographs. Our old mate Tom "Dyna" Mo sent the Web Monster a handful of photos from the Indian Night, but that's about it.   We haven't seen a single snap from the Annual Ball yet, nor from the "Mama Chow's" or the "Wine Tasting" fellowships. Oh well. If you guys don't want the photographic history of KGM to be expanded, there's not much our intrepid Web Monster can do about it. Special Announcement:   Our old mate Vincent "Bone Bender" Lam advises that his favorite charity, The Society for Abandoned Animals, is hosting a concert by world renown violinist Miss Takako Nishizaki at 8:00 p.m. on 24 July 2002 at the Concert Hall of the Hong Kong Cultural Centre, Tsimshatsui. The concert will also include a performance by Hong Kong vocalist Eliza Chan and other local performers.   Ticket prices range from $300 to $700. KGM members interested in attending this fund-raising concert for a worthy cause are asked to contact Vincent by telephone on 9045 6871 or by email.   Dear Geek:   The Geek is on still leave this week so, whatever you do, don't touch your computer. You'll just break something!   Who Am I?    What is the more common name of historical American gunslinger Henry McCarty? The answer appears at the bottom of this issue. Cunning Linguist: Are you curious about the origins of the term "Mayday" ?   This distress call is a phonetic representation of the French "m'aidez", literally "help me". In this case the change from the French is deliberate and not a result of corruption over the years. Its use dates to the 1927 International Radio Telegraph Convention. (Or at least that's when its use was codified; it may have been in unofficial use prior to that.)   Did you ever wonder why... You never hear about "gruntled" employees ? Golden Smile: A young boy asked his father, "Dad, what is the difference between potentially and realistically?"   The father thought about the question for a moment then replied: "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars. Then ask your elder sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then ask your young sister if she'd sleep with Tom Cruise for a million dollars. When you're done, come back and tell me what you learned".   The boy went to his mother and asked: "Would you sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course I would! I wouldn't pass up an opportunity like that, and think of all the things I could do with the money!"   The boy then went to his elder sister and asked: "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh my God ! I would just love to! I would be nuts to pass up such a chance!".   The boy then asked his young sister: "Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for a million dollars?" "Of course, she replied. "Do you know how sexy he is?"   The boy pondered that for a few days then went back to his father, who asked him: "Well son, did you find out the difference between potentially and realistically?"   The boy replied, "Yes, sir. Potentially, we're sitting on three million dollars but, realistically, we're living with three tramps". Quotable Quotes: "Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't".   -- Erica Jong --   The Phantom

"Who Am I?" answer: Billy The Kid.

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