Golden News
Volume 13 - Number 27 - 3rd January, 2000.

The weekly newsletter of the Rotary Club of Kowloon Golden Mile, Hong Kong.
Web site: www.rckgm.org


Last Week's Meeting - The Twilight Zone.
 
Hello ? Is anybody home ?? Judging by the fact that we could barely muster two tables for lunch (and no head table) last week, I guess most KGM members have either left town for the New Year or they decided to start their celebrations early somewhere else. Oh well, never mind. You guys certainly didn't miss anything.
 
Our guest speaker was (in my humble opinion) from La-La Land, or possibly from the Planet Dork, coz I have absolutely no idea what the hell he was on about. The topic was supposed to be "Stress Management" but I was definitely more stressed after his talk than before it.
 
Anyway, the Y2K bug has been and gone with barely a whimper, and life in Hong Kong continues as normal. However I was quite surprised to receive telephone calls from the U.K., Hungary, France and Germany in the first 15 minutes into the New Year in Hong Kong from friends who anxiously wanted to know whether Hong Kong had survived unscathed. Amazing, really.
 
In retrospect, it was all a bit silly really but, despite this, the doomsday pundits are now predicting problems with the leap year as concern is now centered on whether or not our computers will recognise 29 February.
 
How foolish. My main concern right now is what I'm gonna do with all these damn batteries and gallons of water I've got stored up in my flat :-)
 

Welcome Committee:
 
I have no idea who is supposed to be on duty this week, nor do I know who is in town at the moment, so here's the deal guys.
 
Would the first 2 members who arrive at the hotel this Wednesday kindly assume the task ? Thank You.
 
Note to Holiday Inn staff: Expect a sudden rush of members at 12:55 p.m.
 

This Week's Speakers: Position Vacant
 
Topic: To Be Announced
 
I also have no idea who is our guest speaker this week so, if nobody turns up, just talk amongst yourselves, OK ? Thank you.
 

This Week's Birthday Celebrants:
 
01 January - Kishu "Choo Choo" Chotrani, who shares his birthday with J.Edgar Hoover, the former head of the FBI who reputedly liked to dress up in ladies clothing. Hmmm. Nothing wrong with that, really.
 
However having personally donned fish-net stockings, an industrial strength G-String and other female paraphernalia for DG Dipo's 50th birthday some years ago (you had to be there), all I can tell you is that if you are a lad and you happen to drop your keys while dressed that way, DO NOT attempt to pick them up by yourself. Trust me on this. My eyes have started watering just thinking about it ............
 
08 January - Angel "Can You Guess My Vocation This Week" Yan, who shares her birthday with THE KING (i.e. Elvis "The Pelvis" Presley), who is actually alive and well and doing the rounds at Lan Kwai Fong.
 

Next Fellowship Event: Indian Night !

Yes folks, it's on again !!! Our exceedingly generous Indian members have once again graciously offered to host what has arguably been the most fun fellowship on the KGM calendar for the past few years:
 
Time and date: 7:30 p.m. (Indian time), 22 January 2000.
 
Venue: The Viceroy of India Restaurant, Sun Hung Kai Centre, Wanchai North, Hong Kong.
 
Cost: ZIP (unless you are an Indian, in which case your share is a truck load of rupees).
 

Forthcoming Club and District Events:
 
1) 15 January 2000 - District Mahjong Tournament, World Trade Centre Club, Causeway Bay.
 
2) 21 January 2000 - District Golf Tournament, Hong Kong Golf Club, Fanling.
 
3) 25-27 February 2000 - Rotary International Presidential Conference, Regent Hotel, Tsimshatsui.
 
4) 27-29 February 2000 - KGM visit to our sister club, the RC of Paranaque, Manila, to celebrate their 25th anniversary.
 
More information about these events will be provided at the next few regular club meetings.
 

KGM Web Site:
 
OK, so now it's the New Year but the Webmaster STILL needs a break, so he has nothing new to report. Go away.
 

Cool Internet Sites Of The Week:
 
http://www.freeflowers.com/ is a web site tried and tested by The Phantom to send flowers to people around the world. Excellent service and highly recommended.
 
http://www.efax.com/ is an excellent service where you can obtain a free "e-fax" number, whereby people can fax you documents but you receive the documents by e-mail. An excellent service for Road Warriors (i.e. frequent travellers).
 

Quote Of The Week:
 
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

Martin Luther King, Jr.
 

Joke Of The Week:
 
Two dwarfs on vacation in Las Vegas are delighted when they each manage to persuade a beautiful young woman to accompany them back to their rooms.
 
However the first dwarf is extremely disappointed because he is unable to reach a certain physical state that would enable him to consummate his relationship with his date.  His depression is further enhanced by the fact that, for the rest of the evening, he hears cries of "ONE, TWO, THREE ....... HUP!" from his friend's room.
 
At breakfast the following morning, the second dwarf asks the first "Well, how did it go?"
 
The first whispered back "It was so embarrassing. I simply couldn't rise to the occasion, if you know what I mean."
 
To which the second dwarf replied "You think that's embarrassing?" he said. "I couldn't even get up on the bed!"
 

The Phantom